Been very up and down.... I decided it's time to remove and close chapters in my life.
I have worked myself up into beliveing in something that is not true, well hoping in something that is not true..... The twinfalme i feel that is true.
But the person i feel they have crossed over.
And i have to exceept that.... I just was hoping to get Answers to things that i was feeling and picking up but ..... Now i will have to be happy with the answers in my cards and give myself peace of mind.
And let them go in peace as well ..... I dosnt mean i have stopped loving them never will.
Just was not meant to be in this life time.
I get so upset and anger well not really anger just frustrated that i never got to talk to them or meet them face to face and chat.
But we can't bring back the past we can only move forward.
Life is ever changing at lest i know now there on the other side and are my cheer leader.
I hade a big cry and said to myself you have to be relistic and look at the facts.
You know i always new even in my teen's that i would not marry or have a family or partner of my own in this life time. I could feel it is my bones.
It's just not for me this life time. Even my grand mother tolled me i would be an old maid when i was 18 she also knew.
My mother in one of our many my big arguments said who would have me..... Lol lol lol.
I'm to Delulu or Crazy.
Hey I have exceepted this side of myself i get tolled it so offtin.
Even as a child.... You know i didn't have many friend's when i was a little girl.
I was beaten up by a bunch of girls at a Cathlic school because i was poor and my family did not have alot of money...... My closest friend was an very ill girl who hade a feeding tube.
I played most of the time by myself which i didn't mind.
I will never forget that school and the nun's who where so curle... I got the cane for not bring my math's
Book Anouther time a nun would not let me use the bathroom and i wet myself sitting in the chair.
I still can reamber the blue plastic set i sat in I feelt very small.
I never trusted men because of being sexully abused at a young age, my grandmother said to my mother i would forget it because i was so young i was 3.
But when my mothers grandfather died all those's memoryes reserficed it was a horribal time.
I ended up with IBS and Anixity, But the panic attacks started after i was heart broken by a guy i use to work with who i feel in love with i meet him in 2001. Scarry is all i can say.
But i did bring out the romantic side of me love letters and pomes i even sent him flowers.
But it was a Karmic Relashionship it was a lession.
But i don't feel this way for him any more.
I did a release cutting of cords ..... But My twin passed away so i don't need to cut cords....
I just wanted him to be happy ....
I don't need to ask the questions any more i used past life cards.
I have worked myself up into beliveing in something that is not true, well hoping in something that is not true..... The twinfalme i feel that is true.
But the person i feel they have crossed over.
And i have to exceept that.... I just was hoping to get Answers to things that i was feeling and picking up but ..... Now i will have to be happy with the answers in my cards and give myself peace of mind.
And let them go in peace as well ..... I dosnt mean i have stopped loving them never will.
Just was not meant to be in this life time.
I get so upset and anger well not really anger just frustrated that i never got to talk to them or meet them face to face and chat.
But we can't bring back the past we can only move forward.
Life is ever changing at lest i know now there on the other side and are my cheer leader.
I hade a big cry and said to myself you have to be relistic and look at the facts.
You know i always new even in my teen's that i would not marry or have a family or partner of my own in this life time. I could feel it is my bones.
It's just not for me this life time. Even my grand mother tolled me i would be an old maid when i was 18 she also knew.
My mother in one of our many my big arguments said who would have me..... Lol lol lol.
I'm to Delulu or Crazy.
Hey I have exceepted this side of myself i get tolled it so offtin.
Even as a child.... You know i didn't have many friend's when i was a little girl.
I was beaten up by a bunch of girls at a Cathlic school because i was poor and my family did not have alot of money...... My closest friend was an very ill girl who hade a feeding tube.
I played most of the time by myself which i didn't mind.
I will never forget that school and the nun's who where so curle... I got the cane for not bring my math's
Book Anouther time a nun would not let me use the bathroom and i wet myself sitting in the chair.
I still can reamber the blue plastic set i sat in I feelt very small.
I never trusted men because of being sexully abused at a young age, my grandmother said to my mother i would forget it because i was so young i was 3.
But when my mothers grandfather died all those's memoryes reserficed it was a horribal time.
I ended up with IBS and Anixity, But the panic attacks started after i was heart broken by a guy i use to work with who i feel in love with i meet him in 2001. Scarry is all i can say.
But i did bring out the romantic side of me love letters and pomes i even sent him flowers.
But it was a Karmic Relashionship it was a lession.
But i don't feel this way for him any more.
I did a release cutting of cords ..... But My twin passed away so i don't need to cut cords....
I just wanted him to be happy ....
I don't need to ask the questions any more i used past life cards.
The First card I got was trees, I laughted when i saw this It states you have a special relationship to trees, in acient times the celtic and eastern eropean cultures trees were considered sacred, the Druids looked to oak trees for prophetic informashion and ancient healers used tree ingredients shuch as willow bark for medicine. your connection to trees may have been spiritual including the ability to receive messages in some cases trees are animated with real souls known as tree people.you may have been a tree person. |
I hade to keep theses 3 togeather Altantis is the mane resion why were both come back unfinished buisness i know i was a priestess in that life and i worked with crystals and the grids of the earth i was also a healer, he was a priest but power had gorn to his head and he used the crystals wrongly i was tolled his thread eye was shut off for awhile but he did have ablities and used them wrong this is what coursed him to have alot of Certone probleams which i will not talk about on here.
The Trust and faith card has a big influwence on the two cards beside them it states where your trust issues steam from in this life and the two cards beside them where this person had betrayed you in your current life.It also states that god has heard your prays and are being answered learn from theses lessions of the past and that god is in control of this it is out of your hands.
This card of love life that one or mpore of your life times was affected and you may have hade a painful experience back then that has coursed you to be overly cautious working on yourself with self love can help heal and open your heart to be loved again.
it also sates that this man or woman was a proment person in your pastlife. it also sates the could be part of your life in this one ....... inwhich i now know will not happen. it serpose to be for a greater plan.
The Trust and faith card has a big influwence on the two cards beside them it states where your trust issues steam from in this life and the two cards beside them where this person had betrayed you in your current life.It also states that god has heard your prays and are being answered learn from theses lessions of the past and that god is in control of this it is out of your hands.
This card of love life that one or mpore of your life times was affected and you may have hade a painful experience back then that has coursed you to be overly cautious working on yourself with self love can help heal and open your heart to be loved again.
it also sates that this man or woman was a proment person in your pastlife. it also sates the could be part of your life in this one ....... inwhich i now know will not happen. it serpose to be for a greater plan.
The last three could indicate the lives we could had shired togeather the last one really resenates for me its all about balance which is what i try to strive for... this is very inportant to me.
but my guides want me to work on me i have to find 3 things i love about myself pyhistcaly and 3 things i love mentally or emoshionally and work with theses as well as telling myself i love myself
Anyway onto a diffrent subjected i have looked up where i can see Dolfins coffs harbour is the closest place to be near them i think i would like to stay at urunga is where i would like to stay this is where we campted at in a carvan in my teens i would like to walk the big bordwalk and think about the times my father was alive and my brother im planing to do this somewhere around november this year so i can save up the money and plan it propley go up the dorigo rangers and see the waterfalls and rain forests . maybe i can find a crystal shop or get a crystal healing that would be great.
Anyways i enjoyed my walk in the park today must reamber to get my birdy friends some treats i feel so at peace in the park.
I also reambered an old affrimashion
I have peace i have peace i have peace
I am strong i am strong i am strong
i feel great i feel great i feel great
i am free i am free i am free
i like walking along and doing affrimashions im in a peaceful stated and greatfule for the beauty of nature the breezze was lovley today
but my guides want me to work on me i have to find 3 things i love about myself pyhistcaly and 3 things i love mentally or emoshionally and work with theses as well as telling myself i love myself
Anyway onto a diffrent subjected i have looked up where i can see Dolfins coffs harbour is the closest place to be near them i think i would like to stay at urunga is where i would like to stay this is where we campted at in a carvan in my teens i would like to walk the big bordwalk and think about the times my father was alive and my brother im planing to do this somewhere around november this year so i can save up the money and plan it propley go up the dorigo rangers and see the waterfalls and rain forests . maybe i can find a crystal shop or get a crystal healing that would be great.
Anyways i enjoyed my walk in the park today must reamber to get my birdy friends some treats i feel so at peace in the park.
I also reambered an old affrimashion
I have peace i have peace i have peace
I am strong i am strong i am strong
i feel great i feel great i feel great
i am free i am free i am free
i like walking along and doing affrimashions im in a peaceful stated and greatfule for the beauty of nature the breezze was lovley today
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