  I don't know why i feel off today tired feel alittle sick my hip, leg and anckel is acking bad i even feel alittle off in the tummy it could be from the lower hip and back pain. I got A Certifcate for taking today off, I just feel so off. My twin I feel there is a blonde headed lady i feel in her early or late tweentys or early 30's that wants you back you might have had a relashionship with this lady or a fling friends with benafits maybe..... She wants you back or you have feelings for her I am unshore .... Please Don't stop living your life for me i am to far away from you for anything to happen I have to be Relistic.....This was dommed before it even started maybe we can just be friends.....This is up to you. I don't exspected anything from you never have. Live your life be happy ..... i know you can't live with out a pyshical relashionship me on the other hand Can...... I like it no one demanding my time, Not having to relie on anyone but myself, I love just getting in my car and going where i want to go. I'm not hurting whats the use lol lol lol some things are not meant to happen. I don't want to get marryed it's just a pieace of paper. I did when i was younger now after i hit 40 i cryed my eyes out and relised that this was never going to happen for me its not for me if it was it would have happned. No great loss ...... I have my soulmate he's a Tree lol lol lol best thing that ever came into my life. Hes name is Danny ive cryed to danny ive been sick with danny, ive tolled and shared all my secreats to him all my worrys and fears, plus magic with him he loves me i feel it when i sit with him. He's even taken a photo of me and him lol lol lol I'm not lieing. I release you and let you go this is all ive known from you, you come in you go out IT IS WHAT IT IS that is why i don't have any hope for us its just not ment to happen. I don't want to wast your time or mine i have to be happy with what i have, and love myself. In a way its a blessing you live so far away i wount have to be pulled in and out in real life which would have been worse. But can i say one thing just move on this time i'm tired of these's games i'm too old for theses childish games ..... Can i ask one honest question what was the meaning and purpes of it all did you want Revenge to hurt me you've already hurt me enought ..... if that makes you feel happy then good on you, I whish nothing but love and happyness for you peace. One thing my guides tolled me as well as my father who was a real life angel on this earth never whish anyone ill or bad never become like them. You have a girl there that wants you she's reading all my stuff and following me on Utube. I now know why i don't want want to pull my walls down and this time there staying up and i'm quite happy to live in my little pink Bubbel. I already knew this was going to happen ....... no more enought is enought no more chances. I'm cutting the cords and asking for the contracted to be removed. I want PEACE...... my tree gives me peace
The truth is i love Trees and nature more then people and there dramers and you know what i'm stronger then this and i will get threw it. Now i can throw myself back into my work helping the residents who i feel deserves my love more then anyone eals and study Buliding on myself as well as helping others Theres panty other fish in the sea for you you can have anyone you want.... lots of girls whould just love you as you have reminded me in the past. Hate me i don't care whish me nothing but misry i don't care. That is your probleam not mine, what you think and feel about me is your busyness not mine. Ive already had a part of me ripped apart by anouter narsassits. But i'm going to finally get this part of myself back and give all my love to mother nature and myself i deserve my own love I'm not wasting my time and energy on anouther man unless god throws him in my path like i said hopeful anouther start seed with beautiful eyes i whish you love happenes and nothing but the best...... I'm still going to help others who have Troubel with Anixity and depression as well as self love while also working on myself. i'm also too old for a love Relashionship i'm 51 now i gave up hope when i hit my 40's i'm both too old and tired to even try any more it's to much work. I have exceepted that this is my path my life and i do fee this was what i wrote in my own life scriped before coming her do my job and get out. Maybe its all about self love and respected and not what to settal for. Finally good bye and good luck the door is closed please do not come back it is OVER. I know in my heart it is. I really have no Idear why you came into my life maybe to see my own self worth and give myself love and to see what a true player is thank god i never physical meet you i could just imagion the damage that would have coursed me. Do i hate you NO i just have to stop exspecting to much and relise some things are just not ment to happen. Theres someone eals out there for you i feel a lady with aurben hair very Thin and tall very sexy. In her late 20's early 30's sexy brown eyes, very senshal you type to a t she is confiten and oosssess sex apeal i don't know why but this woman may even have been in movies but not your normal movies you know what i mean wink wink. For some resion why do i see these's kind of magaziens with you i see 4 to 6 of them
  Feel so Tired Today I did not sleep well lastnight my anckel was acking driving me insane, Ok my twin I feel like you didn't sleep well, I also have somthing i need to pass onto you someone is serching for you and there on the look out i keep feeling there flowing me i could be wrong but don't feel i am, This person has a very clingy and controling i don't get a very good energy from this person it's very dark and cinacal, This person is out for revenge they can be very abusive and controling munipulive.... Hummmm Ive been sending them angels to keep there energy away. I don't whish them bad just don't want there energy near me. I had the worst sleep lastnight i just could not swich off i'm so tired I need a nap badly. I also found a heap of UFO books at a cheep shop.
I could not Belive i found these's must be perfect timing Ive also decided to put on my site a QHHT Blog as well as spiritual I want to put out on my page spirit Guide drawings and Readings. Its time to try.... I need I have a Email for people to contacted me I did a Spirit Guide drawing for a lady from France Last year it was so amasing. I only need a photo of someone ... See I pick up so much about a person from there photo's there Aura there past lives Energy blocks i can do Reiki healing from a distence as well. Reiki changed my life I did my first Reiki inishashion in 2001 my life just flipped after that my life changed ive done my second inishashion and Master on line by an amashiing lady and i feelt it too just beautiful. I did it online at a online course place called Udemy there so fantastic so much on there. And so afordbal. I did remoteviweing course which was done by an ex milatery man he is amasing, Also i feel you around me again lastnight i know your down i whish you could contacted me facebook is just full of scammers now and i keep getting friend request's from ex miltary man when i look at there pics i feel nothing no pull no connection, no attracshion, If they where a UFO hunter or Spiritual or loved cats on nature it might be diffrent. But i really want to help other people with Anixity and depression, So i want to put this on here. Like the things ive used to help myself. Tips to help others I whish to help others ...... as well as self love this is something im starting with. I feel your still healing also please be gental with yourself..... And please i don't want to take your power away from you i just want to be a good serport team for someone that you can talk to. This is what i said to Carline and mel i don't want someone to heal me or solve my probleams i need to do this i just want someone to talk to who can give me the serport emotional a sortport team. I hope you will maybe see me as this a good friend i don't know if you trust me i know trust is built and ernt not damanded. And i know what it feels like to be taken adventige of you when your vonrbal or in a vonrabal stated. Which i feel what has happened to you ...... I just whish i could Talk to you But i can't force you and i won't. This is my Email [email protected]. I have no idear on how to conneceted with you ..... Theres Rumble https://rumble.com/ i love watching whats going on there you get news that dose not hide the truth.
I'm going to put some movies on here that you might like to watch that i love. You don't have to watch them i just wanted to share them with you as well as books. And courses..... But i love you i'm with you energiticaly and im your cheerleader ill keep cheering you on your friend anyways going now i really want a nap. I am starting to wear a rose quartz heart now and i programed it to give me self love love you and big squezzy hugs....
  Wow The energy I'm picking up today i just want to cry i feel like my twin is sad today i think he saw something i wrote on a twin flame post. im very sorry this was a coupel of days ago i was feeling over wheamed and moody and did not think. It was about twinflame cord cutting, my guides tolled me you can't cut cords with your twin flame as yous are part of the same soul so you can't cut it as you are one and the same. And they said i should really think before i acted feel the emoshion then let it shift. Be more considret . They said we are learning and growing from each other. I'm proude of you i don't hate you never will. I love you so much i have you energitcaly in my life and i don't want you to go away ive missed you so much. I got My answer You are Alive pyhiscaly but i didn't get it from a reading my guides tolled me to look at something and i read it and i went shit ..... My gut feeling was right. I do hear you at night tell me you love me your my big angel you watch over me i feel you with me everywhere i feel your warmth Lastnight i did i love your warm energy your so senstive and have shuch a sensative heart i thoght i was sensetive but i think we are as bad as each other. I started crying yesterday afternoon about 4, 5 i feel like your so lonley. Even when your with friends and family. Which is so sad. I just picked up a tree image maybe your having time sitting under a tree. I woundered did you get marryed if so who what where they like i keep picking up arguments and fights alot of misunderstands so diffrent and not anouth connection. I asked wether you have children I keep picking up one... I have none only my fur and feather babyies. I'm not upset i keeped beeing tolled at a young age i will never have kids. I do but on the ethric 4D and 5D with my twin 2 there in there ethric it was conntracted with them yes them. lol lol lol ok i got the green light God gave the green light what did you do or what did i do i was just given a message that we have work to do togeather. Ok and it's also somthing to do with them I need to draw them The little beings..... And yes again Im on the Alien hunt for informashion. I feel you did not sleep well lastnight you need to rest, I also saw you standing infront of a window waering like long track pants no shirt, the moon was shinning in the window i could see your back and i wanted to hug you so i did i cuddled up to your back i feelt you hold my hand and asked why i was there i said i missed you and i love you. You looked so sad. also I had a very very Busy day yesterday i had shopping bills to pay then i had my massage oh yes and also i will only talk to Carline and Mel about you no one eals.
I also asked what job you do i keep getting privet investergater or someone that works with police but i also feel like computers as well industrial ???? good with hands and building. Industral Engrinering Digital Engrinering????? Building computers...?????
  Well I had my first client with QHHT It went alot better then i thought it would. This lady is alot like my self very open minded . I set the room up and took my ipad to record the session i will be putting this on a USB for this person so they can re watch it and get more informashion. I noticed she relaxed quite well..... And went into it very deeply which was great she noticed a place with alot of big Amethyst Crystals i was also picking this up and cold sense the crystals she started crying i asked her what do you sense from theses crystals what do you feel are the cold she stated home it was lovley i asked her where did she feel this place was was it in space anouther planet systeam or earth she stated here on earth, I asked her what she feelt the crystals wanted her to know she said to help people become more inlightened and to help the earth heal... we sat there with this for awhile then come back i noticed when she came back it took her awhile to come back into her body it was very intresting to watch. I feelt it went very well for my first session i was so excitted i feelt like ive done this before like Dasavo. It feelt so right...... I also meet anouther like minded soul.
This is the little turtel I saved the other day
Some beautiful Photos ive taken i love looking for colours in nature
This is my serathim angel Hactor Actor but it sounds like hactor
 I don't feel my twin as strong today backed off abit maybe busy not shore or his not letting me see or pick up alot i also could smell cinnaman donuts last night nicceee. Anyways i'm going to levae it here feeling tired
 Well 3 days off after today and i start with first Gine pig tomorrow With My QHHT i'm quite excitted this lady said that she know's two other ladies that whish to do this as well. My guides said keep doing the things you love and also learn to trust your Intuition i was meditating and connecting with my twin flame i saw a beautiful blue then i saw myself standing in a room that was round looking with small lights and shiny silver floors the room felt cool there was a funny hassey air that reminded me of fog. I thought this looks so familuya i looked younger like in my teens like 18 i was what it looked like i was wearing my night clothes i feelt alittle cold then i saw a figure enter from what look's like a slide door i can't fully see him untill his standing in the light. He look's confused like why am i here what is this place, Hes very tall i can see his eye's he looks fearful like why am i here. I can see him holding his arms tightly around him Now i can see small beings standing behind us there very short with almost white skin i know these's beings they don't stand in the light because they don't want us to see them. The room almost reminds me of a Sergical ward if i look up the lights are in a big circel and very bright. I don't know him but i know his eyes i thought this is how i know your face and why i have dreamped of you. I feel like one of my questions have now been answered. This made me cry now i know why. I can feel like a force push us closer togeather he hasn't even looked at me yet. I heard Contract this is part of our contract. I feel my heart pounding in my chest. He dose not look comfotabal for a big man i can see fear in his eyes and he want to run out of here. I can see theses beings so clearly now There looking at me pointing at him. Where standing right in front of each other but hes looking around at theses beings. He only looked at me when i took his hand i wanted to comfort him because i could see his fear in his eyes. I touched his face and said it's ok, your safe its going to be ok. I'm drawn to his foread there's a small make there and i'm drawn to behind his left ear. He has lovley hands lovley skin. I think i know what's going to happen here...... Then the seen is blanked out all i see is myself laying on a sliver tabel. He's not in the same room in anouther ....... I just keep thinking so this is how i know you. Your eyes. I was tolled this happened a few times. Im not shore if my twin is drawn to aliens ive been obsessed since i was a child I think i'm starting to get answers Anyways i got My neck and back massage it's pretty good i have to get my stuff ready for tomorrow and i want to get some decent sleep
 I'm very tired today neally sleeped in this morning i hade a really good sleep my mind has been going around and around I'm a truth finder i always serch and try to get the truth. I won't stop looking untill i get it. My one probleam is my twin i can't get them out of my head day night at work when i walk in my dreams. Then ill start crying i keep getting i miss you i love you, i feel the same way its like an ack in my heart and soul. But my one probleam is Are they Still alive pyshicaly in the world i don't want to dalued myself in thinking they are and they have really crossed over. I sked for sines but i just keep cross checking it over and over again. My guides said to me yous are always energitical linked that will never change they tolled me write so im writing. I just feel so frastrated because i can never physical meet them. I wanted to talk to them so much and know them what was there child hood like did they like art. I'm sad because so many people got to talk to you and meet you i never could. I was so drawn to you your eyes i loved everything about you. I don't feel i will every meet anyone ill will be happy with anyone eals my heart just yearns for you. Its so hard i want to walk away but its so hard. I don't hate you i will never hate you I can't stop loving you. But if you want me to let you go i will, I don't own you. I just love you so much songs keep coming up that make me cry......
I think with the readings ive been getting what will be will be. The ball is in your court not mine, I do care I worry the same way that i'm over thinking things. If i friten you i am so sorry i don't mean too. But i just feel you all around me i know that there is chance you still not in the Physical. But i just want to shair my day with you my toughts. I whish i could have touched your hand and chatted with you. I always feel like your my best friend i feel like i can be myself around you and i wanted to shair all my toughts and idears with you. Ive been seeing alot of 777. when i see 222 i know everything is ok, 444 my angels are with me I wounder what your skin feelt like or your smell the smell of your skin and hair. To look deeply in your eyes and hear your warm smooth voice i would have loved to have kissed your lips and hug you i love hugs. I won't lie sometimes i got jelouse but became anger with myself and reminded myself i don't own you. I keep getting so many sines I keep getting messages threw readings on TikTok and Utube that someone is coming into my life. If i have to let you go Atlest good send me a starseed like myself with beautiful eyes. Someone that likes the same things i like. I wounder if you are also getting mixxed thoughts, I sort of wounder what was your soul contracted i look at your life and look at mine so so diffrent in many ways. why do i feel your in a very dark place at the moment..... you have to be strong you iver let it drag you down or pull yourself up. I will pray for you, i feel it all comes down to you how this gos.
 Well the energy is quite intense todaywe have been getting alot of solar flares today we got a massive X2 flare and where also getting a miner solar storm i can always feel them my back gets a prickely hot feeling on it. I feel like someone was talking about me my ears got hot, Feel quite tired today i sleeped well lastnight i neally have my seraphim drawing done. I have a few more symbols to draw on it. I enjoyed my walk in the park today my leg feels abit better today just sleepy ..... it might been the full moon coming sometimes i get alittle tired before or after a full moon they call it full moon hang over, and body acks. I also awake in strange lyeing pose this morning my neck ouch ..... I love the two disyney cartoons beauty and the best and hercules are my favourts. also on my walk i found a little turtal on its back so i helped it back to the river. it had bright green eyes so pretty it looked like someone had pushed it onto its back poor thing i don't understand why people do things like that so crule.
 Getting around to 10:00pm starting to feel sleepy my favourt flower is a wild flower blue bells in australia there so sweet ive loved them since i was a child i use to pick them for my mum and grand mother as well as sunflowers.
 Hade A bad night lastnight my siatica fleared up and i didn't sleep One of the worst nights i have had in ages, I didn't feel so good today. And yesterday i was trying to find this song i reambered i use to hear it on the bus when i lived in Newcastle i loved this song and the song by coldplay clocks. The song popped into my head tonight when i had a salt bath i thought yes that's the song. I love newcastle i miss that place the beautiful beachs the fun i hade and i meet two soul sisters Annette who was my twin sister in a past life in romania we also had a life as fairys. And julie who in a past life was my father in one life i miss my friend julie she helped me so much my cat gypsy brout us togeather that cat was so specheal to me, she helped me when i was in one of my most dark places she would hit me on the nose to get up lol lol lol i loved her so much
I also tonight chated with god i said come on big guy give me truth and nothing but the truth where is my twin flame is he here or on anouther planet is he across the veil, just give me the truth . But i also want to give you this because it just making me so confused and is messing up my head and triggering me, did i get it all wrong and thought it was a person who looked like him like in that movie with branden frazer bedazzaled they say there is two of us maybe this is where i got it wrong. I said comeone i'm a big girl give me the truth i'm just so tired of this crap. Then after i blanced my charkras with the penjulam. I looked on utube for some soft relaxing music and come across. The twin flames united sound. The sound made me relaxed and made me think of rolling waves like the ocean, i could see fish turtels, and dolfins seaweed moving with the eab and flow of the waves then i saw myself in outerspace and moving towards Siruis i saw a bright blue star it was beautiful my feet landed on the ground and there he was to great me a tall lean figure like how i drew him only not a human pysical form only an energy form. I heard do look for feachers feel his energy his energy reminded me of the soft waves of the sea clam, gental quite but strong silent and wise, I could feel the beautfule blue energy pacent. But when i look at his energy i see bright golden yellow like a flickering flame of a candel. This instantly made me feel realxed happy and calm. I had a feeling he was not on earth Here i was looking for this soul for years and he was cheering for me on the outerveil. Am I sad No not at all, every time i lisen to this music i can visit him or him me i feelt a sense of peace and home coming warmth frienship and love. I also thanked god for showing me the truth...... And now i can give thsi worry to god now. and finally let it be ..... I don't have to serch any more he is always with me. Know wonder my guides tolled me i was never alone. I just picked up a beautiful blue butterfly.... This is his symbol for me or a blue Dragonfly. Or if i burn a candel and look at the falme it will remind me of him. Maybe that's why i want to see a dolfin to connected to my home planet. Siruis come up in my acashic reading but in a dream i was also showen Andromada. I feel sudenly at peace now like a wait has liffted my shoulders. Lol lol lol he's not here .......... I don't know why i feelt he was this other person maybe they just look alike hummm Oh well all those;s girls can fight and have him now I know the truth. Stupid girl i am lol lol lol wouldnt hade looked twice at me like one of his Exs said i would be to fat and uygly not his type lol lol lol it wasnt even him just looked like him. Anyway i know ill sleep better tonight i feel a sence of peace. No more surching no more looking My big Blue angel is on Siruis and i can visit him in meditashion i can hold his hand and talk with him when ever now . I wanted to know why ...... now i know why. Anyways i feels good after my salt bath and charkra balance just got to get my leg to setal down.
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